Sunday, February 25, 2007

Where have all the good people gone?


My experiences in Malaysia have been varied...
Mostly bad though.

I expected people to be friendly - warm, welcoming...but that was a far cry from what I faced.

I remember when I was in school, in a far away place, over 10,000 miles away; when someone new came to class, from another country, not knowing a word of our local language...we were nice. More than nice. We were empathetic.
I think these people here know not the meaning of the word.

We would try to make the new-comer feel safe, understanding that it must be difficult to make such a transition. We would teach them the language, we would invite them to play rounders with us. We were nice.

But it didn't happen here.

Instead I was out casted by my own race for not knowing the local language and having a far more superior command of other languages.
Not a day would pass without a comment - be it in front of me or behind me (usually the preferred mode of insult).

"You think you so great cos you come from XXXXXX ah?"

"You think you so cool cos you speak in slang ah?"


IT'S NOT SLANG IT'S AN ACCENT


And I am a firm believer of living for yourself - and not for others, don't ever let those outsiders get the better of you....
But how long could I keep up the fight? .

Why couldn't they see a person who had left their world as they had known it to be in a different country?
Where was the empathy? Where was the compassion? Where was the human decency in these vile, selfish people?

I held on with the hope of going back home.
But eventually...

I broke.

What was once a young person so full of promise and dreams, metamorphosed into a bitter, pathetic shadow of who they used to be.


It took time. Years.

I found a life again.

The wounds healed.

Mental and physical.

I never want to be in that dark place again.


This country - Malaysia - destroyed me and all that I was.

And I blame it entirely on the people. Their narrow-mindedness, their short-sightedness, their venir outlook, their jealousy, their inability to comprehend or appreciate anything that is beyond their realm of normalcy, their resistance to accept anything or anyone that is different, their self-pity...

People have the power to make you completely miserable.

The country can grow - as fast and as much as it likes.

But if the people are still so SMALL - what is the point?



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